It’s not easy to define the exact moment this crazy journey started. I suppose in a way it’s been happening for a while. I can’t remember a time that I wasn’t taking pictures, and telling stories, but recently it’s been a challenge to balance the creative tug with the reality of raising a family. Gone are the days that I can just pick up and go. These days it takes me even longer to get out of the house, which many will attest, was never a quick process to begin with. But even with the changes and challenges that come with this season of life, my family is at the heart of what I do.
The story of how Lou La Mae Photography came to be is centered around two little girls.
If motherhood has taught me one thing, it is that you are never, EVER alone. I am constantly watched, followed, questioned, and brought to my knees in humility with my girls’ observations. If one of them doesn’t catch me doing something, the other does. My 8-year-old loves to remind me of things that I said months ago…promises I made in rash moments of specific need…when I sometimes don’t even remember that morning (depending on the strength of the coffee that day). My 2-year-old follows me around like a shadow and even though she’s on the cusp of talking, she mimics everything. I know that she KNOWS. There is rarely a moment that is not witnessed by one of them…good, bad or otherwise.
It is in these collective moments, when I sit back to look at that larger picture unfolding, I realize that these beautiful children are my mirror. I see myself reflected back in so many ways, when I thought it would be the other way around. I have never been so humbled…so aware. I find myself telling them that they can do anything, be anything and all the while I’m letting my fear dictate my own dreams. So, in order for them to believe what I tell them about their own gifts, their own talents…I have to lead the way and start believing in mine.
In order for my girls to see my heart, I have to be willing to show it to them.
HARDEST. LESSON. EVER.
Because it involves showing them the imperfect moments, the failures, the struggles and the tears…the things that I want to hide away. But I have realized that in the end, it shows them so much more than my fears.
It shows them Grace. Strength. Perseverance.
It shows them Jesus.
Everything that I strive for…every good thing I want to give my girls is nothing if they don’t see Jesus in my heart, in my words, and in the steps I take in faith.
Lou La Mae is my way of honoring my children.
Tessa Louise and Zoey Mae.
And honoring The One who gave me all that I have and am.
Wife.
Momma.
Photographer.
Story -teller.
